Cheryl

Pretty much dead in the water so far as the woman thing goes. Can feel the energy is vacated, not from me but from the general milieu. Even the Peacock is gone. And things seemed so promising. Talked to my friend at the Senior Center. I give her counseling ten minutes a week. She is now having trouble with worrying. Little things bother her. She has decided she is not self-assertive enough. She doesn't assert herself and then feels bad about it. She said, "I wanted to go to a little shop and my aunt said no and she was driving. I was terribly disappointed. It was right close by and we could have stopped. But I didn't say anything. I just felt bad".

"Well my rule is just speak out", I answered. "You have to be able to say what you feel. Can't be second guessing and create a labyrinth for what can and cannot be said for everybody. The intellect completely overwhelms the emotions. Have to remember what the rules are for this individual. Have to calculate what can and cannot be said in this instance. Have to ponder the affects beforehand of statements to be made. It kills all the spontaneity and is automatic suppression of feelings. My rule is just say what I want. For instance I just flat-out say whatever. If someone says to me they are a Christian, I say I am a Pagan. If they tell me they are Republican or Democrat, I might say I am a socialist. They can either accept it or not. If not - I don't want to deal with them. Let them go on their merry way. I am not going to start a guessing game as to what I can say and what I cannot - mind control games."

"Course it is different if you are living with someone. In that case I am more prudent and reserve response, which would incite antagonism in a present instance. I will bring the problem up at a more opportune time, when my other is more inclined to accept an opposing perspective. In my last relationship of ten years we never had a fight. In the instance of living with someone, the relationship is more important than defending my feelings which I know are sound." "Well I think I should talk to my aunt, tell her how I feel. I think that will make me feel better", she said.

So then out of the blue a situation occurs. Now and then, not very often, I find an ad of interest on Craigslist. About all that the answering of ads has ever amounted to is an opportunity for creative writing, although I did turn down a couple of opportunities. The thought is: what can I come up with as a response for this one? So I created a response to an ad seemingly in search of the metaphysical.

"I write philosophical, psychological and metaphysical theory. "metaphysically like minded people...". Don't think there is any such thing at least not for me. So what I mean is: as was just saying to someone today, Sherlock Holmes is my favorite philosopher, the best ever played by Jeremy Brett, Granada Television ... because a theorist is about solving problems, and he used all manner of means in solving same, as empirical observation, concentrations, drugs, analytical processes, on-site investigation, and lived a life totally dedicated to the processes of mystery analysis. The "concept of non-duality": There is only one planet earth. Since the planet is one single entity, everything of which it is made makes one single thing. Spirituality is everything is one thing. Need is no blame. Duality comes with adoption of excess and profit. Nature becomes inferior and resource for superior development. One's worth becomes how much development one possesses, and not a 'I am all'. Anyway it is a whole theory. Thank you for the accommodation."

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