One

181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190



So now you know - the old Jew looks me in the eye, and you an Arian I think he thinks. This irony has got to be a play on conferred. The Whatnot confirmed. I was safe from Whatnot confinement. The thing is though, I wouldn't throw it in his face. Why be rude even if two-ed. Why take chances ? Why push one's luck ? You think you are entitled ? You are if they give-grant. They have the guns. And then too I knew even then, that I could be them, drafted unwilling, gracelessly. But I didn't have to convert.

If he disappears can I have whatever he had there ? The disappearing-deserved. They were deserving of disappearance. They are not like us. We are the truly sorrys, the truly sympathetic, the truly beneficent, the truly everything. True-evil the anti-appearance of the disappearance death-ray. Great forties radio theater called "Lights Out", which for this specific story was told by sound-affect: "Oh my God, he was sucked inside out", with a prolonged sucking-sound of radio sound-play. True-evil was an apprition in an old vacated house, that turned people inside out with a gush, a whoosh, squish, gish, gush, gosh ! O my God !

You knew they were serious at the border station, where they had sky-eye mirrors on wheels, with long handles to push under the cars and trucks, looking for attempted getemouts. I passed back along the corridor, Berlin by Leipzig. I went through the last guard shack for money check, then the first, second and third trench-coated severity, each a stop and passport check, and then through the last zig-zag series of tank traps, and out-to West Germany again. I confess I gave-up, but I know I would never convert. And there you are the conditional Know-I.

(185 of 278)       Next Page

hr