Invision

This usually meant walking to a bus stop, down on Mission Street, riding the bus to wherever, walking around there and riding the bus back home. And that is how it began. I smoked for a year, staying stoned all day, with a joint just after breakfast. The affect was anywhere from three to six hours. So three joints a day would usually suffice.

I began also to use it for drawing, black ink on white paper, doing sort of schematics of my inner consciousness, nothing intended, just draw by intuition, whatever came out and then trying to interpret it, but not too hard. And I worked in the pottery shop downstairs in the garage. Later when I began to paint my ceramic sculpture with colored stains to be fired on, I would use it to meditate as I painted, seemingly a tether for my body with no wandering around.

So it was that when I was stoned, my first epiphanic episode occurred. It was a Sunday, one of the few things I remember specifically, and no one was home but me. I was in the kitchen maybe around eleven a.m. when it occurred to me that I was God, or at least all-powerful - something like that ! All my reference points got reversed. It was an epiphany. Instead of a single, isolated nobody, I was an all-powerful somebody. It almost knocked me down. It is like suddenly realizing you are a superstar and were all the time but didn't know it. Instead of I am nothing - I am great. What a feeling of exhilaration. After that it was to work out the logic. Suddenly one has a choice. One does not have to remain what they were. But one does not want to be a crazy person either.

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