Invision

She left hardware again without buying anything, and I again began following at some distance, down the street eastward. After some considerable blocks I got impatient and approached her. I said, "how about a cup a coffee"? I immediately realized it was a stupid move. It was hot out. She was not looking for coffee and she was not the type of girl that would frequent coffee shops in any event. This instantly recognized idiocy was apparent in the tone of my voice.

Talk about timing, she took a few more steps not replying, pulled out her keys, went into a building and slammed the door in my face. And then I remembered. I had picked her up before back in Haight Ashbury days, at the Haight Library. She was slim, short blond hair, about five foot seven, good looking with glasses which gave her a studious librarian look. She took me to her apartment and tried to seduce me, but I was so passive I didn't get it, and being as un-aggressive and inexperienced as I was, I think I slept there on the couch and nothing happened. She had some job, but sewed together doo-dad dolls she invented I think in her spare time, and she said she had got an order and may quit her job. So she either remembered who I was at the last minute, or she knew from my statement and tone of voice, and must certainly be more astute now than then, that I was not what she was looking for, although she had given me numerous tips along the way.

At some point, not sure if before or after the beginning of this epiphanic experience, I decided that if I was to understand the human condition it would have to be by the study of myself.

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