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He secretly uses nails in the palms of his hands to create pain, which is to prevent himself from succumbing to the numbing down of his mind.
Another of my interests at the time was Maslow's theory of the hierarchy of need. I cannot remember reading the book so the concept may have been suggested to me, by Andrew perhaps another of the clerks in the office. My interpretation at the time, or as it may have been explained to me, was that before the higher cultural pursuits could be developed, there would first have to be satisfied the more basic needs. The more time in the pursuit of the basic necessities the less time for higher cultural development such as the arts.
The army for me reduced the conceptualization of the 'hierarchy of need' to a cot in a barracks, with a stand-up and foot locker, a mess or dining hall to eat, and a room to work. In my travels throughout Europe I reduced what I needed down to what I could carry on a motor scooter; a sleeping bag and a piece of plastic covering, bags one each for clothes, food, cook-ware, and a bag for accessories. Understanding what was needed and eliminating what was not, became a method and technique of clearing the mind of non-essential clutter and unimportant superfluities, which only distracts one from the appreciation of present reality and thinking.
A singular event maybe in late March of '65 was my night-time excursion into the Arlington National Cemetery. Those who have endured long winters might know what the first really warm spring day and evening feels like. For the first time in many months, a warm, balmy, electric atmosphere.
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